It's been almost 3 1/2 years and I still find that grief is hard. It's a daily struggle to try to come to terms with what I've been through. Right when we faced our most difficult times, I felt comforted. I felt like I had the strength to go through so many obstacles in caring for Megan and her many tasks/needs. I could feel the prayers of others lifting my feet and putting one foot in front of the other.
If I'm being honest, these days I don't feel that. It takes great effort to put my feet on the floor and one in front of the other. I feel so far away from what was and struggling to make something of what is to be now and in the future.
When you've been through what I have, hope is hard. I've heard the tape playing in my mind that, "since God didn't rescue from circumstances then, why would he do anything else now or in the future." I know it's "stinkin' thinkin.'" But it's what I am mulling over right now.
Where Is My Footing
6 months ago
